Not long ago I spoke to you about the rise of a masculine energy in me. An energy close to the muzzle or a lout. Today I want to share with you the rest of this adventure, because the masculine is not just a cliché of a macho, beer can in hand roaring with a baseball bat or a guy with dirty jokes, it has much more to offer us.
This energy exists in every human, because we are made part masculine and part feminine. The ying and the yang have been reminding us of this for a while now, but we have to admit that we are struggling to integrate this notion and tend to live in our clichés.
By noticing my mimicry of the primary male, I also found the clichés that I had with regard to the opposite sex. Was this the only image I had of masculinity? This seizure of power that bordered strength and disrespect? Was my perception of the man similar to that of a shark or a predator? Clearly a little, and it is not a glorious observation. Because these sensitive, generous, attentive and respectful men exist and are more present in our lives than it seems, so where does this feeling come from that only the macho can succeed?
Am I the only one sensing these clichés? Far from there! Men and women suffer the impacts. They undergo these beliefs and patterns at the very essence of their education. While the little boy must be strong and not cry, the little girl is classified as fragile. And this is just one example of everything you’ve heard or seen many times before.
If you could imagine the number of male clients and friends I’ve seen suffer from not having the right to shed a tear or express grief for fear of no longer being a man. Whether in the playground or in the media, the man must be powerful, strong, savior of the world! So much pressure! How much do they feel overwhelmed by the burden of responsibility, because they were educated with the belief that the man was the provider, the head of a family unit and by extension of the world. So much fatigue for this warrior who dreams of just being able to be himself!
The woman also suffers from education’s beliefs, she must speak, look and even in political debates where the importance of her clothes will be most noticed by journalists than her ideals, her agenda or her message, to such an extent that some women use and abuse it to build their career (some men do the same, so you see the clichés are used in both directions). How many women are tired of being on permanent watch, vigilant of their appearance and the look of others both for their safety and their progress?
Here we are today with a shift in societal standards where the warrior faces the mermaid or the princess in semi-distress, while each sex aspires to reveal its real identity to be itself, in its simplicity. A difficult quest when clichés stick to our skin and are reenacted in all forms and layers of society by gestures and sentences done without evil thoughts, just repeating an unconscious pattern. It’s up to us to start changing these clichés.
To integrate this energy in me, I had to take the time to observe myself, but also to question myself on what this masculine wanted to transmit to me. Meditation and writing helped me sort through to understand its message. This masculine wants what’s best for me, and needed to be integrated. It needed my feminine to make room for it and no longer perceive it as a danger but as an ally.
It was necessary to deconstruct my beliefs by looking around me to the men with whom I interact socially or professionally, listening to them to see what they provoked in me: respect, disgust, discomfort or ease, a threat or a collaboration … It was necessary to integrate these parts of the masculine that I respect and appreciate to find which type of masculine energy would be ideal to accompany my female energy. It was necessary to throw away the parts which no longer had their place in my environment, in my reality, in my life. I had to do the same with my feminine energy. It’s only then that co-creation could begin. A dialogue between my energy dualities, a space created so that balance could begin to take shape and thus find harmony.
Once this masculine energy’s raw roar passed, it brought me into a new world; that of structure, firmness and alignment. It doesn’t do it with the force of words, shouting or with blows. It does it through a soft and carrying vibration. It aligns my spine (physical and energetic) to bring me legitimacy, the one I offer myself and not the one the world could give me. Through its subtle vibration it clarifies my priorities, orders my thoughts and supports my feminine energy in the accomplishment of my projects.
The masculine possesses values which, released from behavioral clichés, bring an interior safety and a fabulous, gushing energy, which carries us towards our destiny. Whether you are a man or a woman, I invite you to visit this energy, to talk to it, to understand how it is beneficial to you and to do the same with your feminine side. Only the reconciliation of our parts will allow us to live fully.
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Author: Christel Mesey
Website: www.joywhisperers.com – www.christelmesey.com